Monday, October 25, 2010

Luke turned one

Well, it's official (as of 11 days ago), my little baby is now a moderately sized toddler. We celebrated his first birthday on October 14th and again on the 16th with a slightly larger crowd. I think he had fun. He threw up at one point which I take as the ultimate sign someone is having a great time. It may have also had something to do with the large quantity of mac and cheese he ate. Our boy loves food that incorporates cheese. And also just food.

I can't believe that our little boy is one. It seems like yesterday we were living in Kansas and preparing for his arrival. I remember the day before. Getting the call that my doctor had swine flu and would be replaced by another OB (I was okay with that since the outcome was still me becoming unpregnant). Picking Mom and Pop Hunter up at the airport. Trying to fall asleep that night even though I was over the moon excited to meet our boy.

The morning of the blessed event I woke up at 4:30am due to incredible excitement/anxiety/thirst. Mom and Pop came over for breakfast. I didn't eat since I had surgery scheduled for 11:30. I just watched longingly as they sipped their waters. We all went to the hospital at 10 and I got set up for surgery-gowned, IVed, briefed of every way I could die during a routine C-section (apparently I was giving informed consent. I just thought our anesthesiologist was an incredible pessimist). We rolled into the OR at 11:30 and 15 minutes later we heard a nurse say "That baby's got a round head!" Then we heard his cry. He cried for 10 seconds and then was peaceful. He didn't cry again for 3 days with perfectly portrays his laid back personality although at the time we thought he might be broken. He wasn't. He was perfect. The first time I laid eyes on him, all I could see was Joel. Then he went through an Alfred Hitchcock phase but now he looks like Joel again which is good.

Son, I love you so much. I never imagined I could have so much joy in my life. Our days are blessed because of your smile, your laugh, your obsession with tupperware and your naturally curly hair. I still can't believe I get to be your mom. I can't wait to continue helping you become the man God has called you to be. That man will surely be an incredible one. And a handsome one. And a brilliant, dexterous, charitable, eloquent and temperate one. That is good with children.

I love you kiddo. Happy birthday plus 11 days.

The first time I held my boy.

Good Evening...

Current photo-Playing in the tupperware cabinet. What a genius.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

About a Girl

I realize we haven't blogged in a long while. It isn't because we don't want to, it's because we don't know what to say. Since our last blog, our little niece has gone to be with Jesus. It is still weird to see myself write that. We miss her terribly and although that part hurts our hearts, it it also a constant reminder that her life and her memory are with us. This blog is not intended to make you sad but I can't skip over talking about this one life that touched the lives of thousands.

We know that Ava is doing better now than she ever was on earth. Even when she was fully healthy. Even the knowledge of this fact doesn't lessen the missing her. It may be because I can't really understand that on this side of heaven but really I think it's because all of our lives were more blessed with Ava in them.

As we continue to mourn this great loss, I think mostly about Luke. I think about how Ava loved him and how excited he would be every time he saw her. I think about how she would help me feed him by wiping his face between every bite of food whether dirty or not. I think about how she would watch TV with him while holding his hand and about how impressively high her voice would get when she would talk to him. I always want him to know her. I always want him to understand how many people got to learn about Jesus because her life was short and not long. I want him to be brave like her.

I have always claimed to believe that God redeems all things. Admittedly, it is harder to stand by that statement when it is truly tested. God has been gracious in showing us a glimpse of how he is and will continue to redeem this hurt. The most recent stats from Josh (Ava's dad) for Ava's memorial service were that 9,000 viewed it throughout 49 countries. 4,000 of those viewed it live either in person or online. I know very few people whose lives have reached that many for Christ. Let alone the life of a five year old. Ava is truly an inspiration.

I have one request from all who have travelled this journey with Josh, Lisa and Noah. It is the best way you can honor Ava. Find out if Jesus is who he said he was. Start there. Allow it to be that simple.

We love you and thank you for every prayer and every word of encouragement.